Did Gogol Find the One?

              I really hope that Gogol and Moushumi end up together because he has the opportunity to marry the only person that will ever understand his struggle in choosing between Indian culture and American culture. Moushumi and Gogol grew up together, were dragged to all the same extended Bengali family events and introduced as cousins. They have both strayed from their Indian heritage and do not continue to follow many of the Bengali traditions (much to their parent’s dismay). Although Gogol “[talks] to the driver in Bengali” he does not eat Indian food every night, and neither does Moushumi (Lahiri 200). This is why Moushumi cooks Italian food for Nikhil when he first visits her apartment even though “[her] mother is appalled that [she’s] not making [him] Indian food” (Lahiri 209). Now, after going on a couple dates with Moushumi, Gogol cannot stop thinking about her and remembering little things about her when she was a girl. They both are able to reminisce about the other person from old Bengali events and realize that they could have been close so long ago. Although they were both reserved going into their first “blind date” because their mothers set it up, they cannot help by falling in love. I really hope that she ends up being the one he marries because they share the same childhood, a rebellious adolescence, and have now met back up. They are both looking to settle down (or maybe just their mothers think they are) and they are going to find the cliché person they feel like they’ve know their entire lives in each other, because they kind of have. 

Carefree

       After reading chapters 5 and 6 of Jhumpa Lahiri’s novel, The Namesake, I am skeptical of the authenticity of Gogol’s relationship with Maxine. I wonder if the only reason that he is with her is because he strives to go against the life his parents had planned for him. Part of the reason that he falls in love with Maxine, her family, and her lifestyle is because his parents could never participate in her world. He recognizes that “his immersion in Maxine’s family is a betrayal of his own” because his parents don’t know Maxine exists, they would never care about their dinner debates, would never approve of them drinking bottle after bottle of wine every night, sleeping in the same bed, or being intimate at all privately or publicly for that matter (141). But he continues to live there, sleep there, and eat there as if in some sort of fairytale.

            Maxine and Nikhil float around this grand and expensive house with no responsibilities. I cannot get over how strange it that Nikhil and Maxine are living together, but under her parents roof. They never have to pay rent, make or buy dinner, wine, or desert. It almost seems like they are just mooching off of Maxine’s family wealth. When they are left alone in the house, Nikhil finally feels as if they are a couple living together, but all they do is “stray to lower stories, making love on countless pieces of furniture, and wander[ing] naked from room to room” (142). They are acting like hormonal teenagers who are left alone for the first time. Everything about their relationship is carefree and easy because they do not have anything to worry about. I just hope that once they finally have some responsibility that they are able to continue to go about their relationship with such ease. I believe that because his life is so easy, so wonderful, and so different from his life on Pemberton Road, is why it is the only time in his life that “he [has felt] free” (158).

Common Ground

           Through Gogol, Ashima and Ashoke’s son in The Namesake, I have learned the Begali traditions that come with motherhood. The mother’s whole family takes large roles in the first years of a child’s life. Mothers and grandmothers serve as midwives because pregnant women traditionally return to their parents home to have their children. I wish that this tradition was a part of our culture. There is something beautiful about bringing a child into the world in your childhood home and “[retreat] briefly to childhood when the baby comes” (Lahiri 4). Begali people have pet names used between family and friends and then a more intimate name. They do not repeat names like we do in US and British culture; they create a new name for every child so that each name is unique to its owner. Often mothers do not choose their children’s names, grandmothers will name their grandsons. After the baby matures and is able to eat whole food, brothers hold their nephews as they enter the world of consumption. He also holds the baby while chooses objects that might predict his future. While there are cultural differences between the United States and India, we still overlap on common ground.

In both of these vastly different cultures, women see their children as perfect miracles that their bodies have been able to create. The process of brining new life into the world might be painful, but both cultures believe pain has no memory. In reading this novel I have learned about Begali culture as Ashima and Ashoke reminisce about their lives back in India like they are in some sort of incomplete dream, hoping to wakeup one day and return home.

Numb

         The Underground Man, in the book Notes from Underground, justifies his spite as a result of years of becoming numb to wrongdoing. He sees the beauty in the world, not as an inspiration to the good of the world, but as something that highlights the evil in the world. As we grow up, the Underground Man explains that we might initially feel guilt gnawing on our insides after we utter our first curse word, or tell our first lie, but eventually that feeling goes away. We keep committing the same evil until it becomes a habit and that awful feeling goes away. It gets to the point where we are so accustom to committing these wrong doings, that eventually we derive pleasure from them. We take pleasure out of tricking our parents because of a lie, or think we are cool because we can curse without our body repulsing from the action. Because the Underground Man had endured this process over the years, he has become the cynical and spiteful man that he is now. He is pleased when people get angry with him, because he makes people mad for fun. He enjoys their emotional outbursts, and although he doesn’t consider himself a spiteful man, he likes being one.  

Stereotypes

          Chinua Achebe, in his story Things Fall Apart, and Mariner’s Church, through their Teen Center hope to complete the single story of Africans and Teenagers. Africa is stereotypically portrayed as a devastated country, enveloped in hunger and disease. Teens are stereotypically rowdy, unproductive, unintelligent, slackers, who have no regard for the people around them. Achebe challenges the stereotype of Africans with extensive cultural distinctions within the subcontinent. Mariner’s built a space, in which, teens have a safe place to be themselves. Achebe and the Youth Center have acknowledged that there is a stereotype with some truth, but strive to complete the single story by presenting a complete one. In recognizing both the truth and misconceptions in the stereotypes of Africans and teenagers, Chinua Achebe and Mariner’s Church are able to complete the single story. 

            Africa is not the hopelessly devastating place it is portrayed to be. We cannot generalize Africa as a uniformly, poverty stricken, diseased, and starving place, because in reality these characteristics are not aspects of the typical African’s life. Africans are not an entirely brutal, savage, and uncivilized people. The media has depicted Africa using pictures of emaciated children, and literature teaches us human trafficking in Africa. Africa has become generalized to the point that we do not differentiate Africa into different countries, but simply refer to it in its entirety. Although some of these components of the African culture may be true, they deprive Africa of its rich culture, which varies all over the country.

            Mariner’s also is trying to dispel the stereotype of being a teenager by completing the single story in the same way that Achebe does. The behaviors of some teenagers influence the total reputation they have. Teen’s reputation is generated from reports of their crimes and bad behavior all over the news.  Rowdy, law breaking, child stars make headline newspapers, are plastered on magazines, and talked about over every social media platform. As a result, some people believe Enrico Uva, a discrimination debater, in his article “Discrimination Against Teenagers” when he says “Teenagers: when left unsupervised for an extended period of time, they will all supposedly drink, smoke up, get pregnant/impregnate” but the disruptive, and inappropriate stereotype does not apply to all groups of teens (Uva p.1). Teenagers are very often considered as sex-crazy, irrational, drug addicted, inconsiderate, lazy, twerking, hoodie-wearing, Justin Bieber acting, disruptive, juvenile delinquents. Because of the single story of teens, they are unfortunately unwelcome almost anywhere.

            Achebe completes the single story of Africans by highlighting the cultural differences, not only between Africa and the rest of the world, but even between villages. He accomplishes telling all sides of the African story through his protagonist, Okonkwo, who is tougher and more brutal than the men from the more passive people of his mother' tribe. While, Okonkwo’s tribe, Umuofia, values wrestling and a male dominance over his women, Okonkwo describes Mbanta as "a womanly clan" (Achebe 159). He associates his motherland with womanly attributes because they do not immediately resort to fighting the Christians after the affect they have on the Ibo people. Achebe also represents the Ibo people in a different light than their stereotype because Okonkwo has enough food, him and his family are not poor, they are not all sick. While they have some character traits that do match the single story we know, Achebe writes Things Fall Apart to illustrate the cultural depth the Ibo people have. But in portraying Ibo people with some of their brutal and savage characteristics, he has affectively completed the single story, rather than create another.

Mariner’s Church strives to complete the single story of being a teenager because the Mariner’s Church Youth Center, according to Senior Pastor Kenton Beshore, in the High School Ministry website, “is intended to be a place where anyone in any walk of life can come, feel comfortable, laugh, and be challenged to grow closer to God” (Mariners Church, par.3) Mariner’s Church built the Youth Center for the sole purpose of creating a space where teens are accepted not only despite of their flaws, but also because of them. Designed just for teens, the center has “two stories of indoor basketball courts, pool tables, table top games, a skate board/bike park, and studio space with state of the art sound, video and lighting designed for students to listen, record, and practice” (Mariners Church, par. 2) The Youth Center is a space for teens, run by teens. High schoolers are encouraged to lead games, concerts, and in ministry. Teens are welcome to hangout in the Youth Center after school and eat food from the Mariner’s Global Café, while not be considered lazy. Groups of teens are encouraged to bring their skateboards and play basketball and not be considered disruptive. Girls and boys are free to talk to each other without being looked at with social or sexual concerns. Without having strict security measures, Mariner’s has created a trusting and safe environment where drugs and weapons are not present. Here, teens are allowed to be teens, true to some of their stereotypes, but welcomed, encouraged, responsible, and successful.

Achebe represents Africa’s unique culture through its individuality, completing the story by telling both sides. Achebe portrays Okonkwo as a man who has gained status by “bring[ing] honor in his village by throwing the Amalinze the Cat” (Achebe 3). He chooses to use wrestling as the means in which Okonkwo gains titles within his village to challenge the stereotype further. He also shows Okonkwo’s brutality when “…he beat [his wife] heavily. In his anger he [forgets] that it [is] the Week of Peace” (Achebe 29). Even though Achebe shows the importance of culture and tradition to Ibo people, he also explains that breaking these laws is highly frowned upon and can have repercussions for the entire village. Okonkwo is then seen as ruthless and savage when he “drew his machete and cut [his son] down” (Achebe 61). Because there is high importance on strong men, Okonkwo is forced to prove himself against the young boy who calls him father. Okonkwo participates in the murder of his own son because “He was afraid of being though of as weak” (Achebe 61). He feels obligated to cut down his own son because he has built his whole life on maintaining strength and deference. The author illustrates the differences between Umuofia and Mbanta to explain that the brutality in the men in Umuofia does not apply to every tribe, or all Africans. Through Okonkwo we learn how different African tribes are from our culture, and how each tribe is different from their neighbors.

Achebe and Mariner’s Church both complete their respective stereotypes through their approach of providing a complete story. By choosing to accept truth in whole story, they are reliable in expelling the stereotypes of being African, or being a teenager. By building the Teen Center, Mariners has acknowledged that while teens need guidance, they also need a safe place where they are welcome despite their stereotype. Similarly, Achebe shows the brutality of the African people, but also illustrates their distinct culture. Their success derives from their ability to shine light confidently on the dark side of a people, knowing that their positive character traits with carry through.

            Stereotypes of any given culture or group are not necessarily wrong, they are just incomplete. Achebe and Mariners are successful because Things Fall Apart is written including Okonkwo’s brutality, and Mariners acknowledges that teenagers are not welcome by most of the community. As a result, they have given them a place to land, a place that they are accepted despite and because of their laziness, or their impulsiveness, and their inability to think of the future. One Mariners student said, “I come here and I am continued to be excepted by these people no matter who I am… [What] I love about High School Ministry is that we are so excepting and loving.” Achebe and Mariner’s Church have given us the opportunity to benefit from our personality traits by showing the other side of the story; the whole story.